Ants Climbing a Tree

1. Mix cornstarch and water into a slurry, then mix the meat, cornstarch slurry, soy sauce, sesame oil, and rice wine together (in all honesty, I guesstimated on the amounts; mix as you wish). Let marinate for about 30 minutes.
2. Soak the vermicelli in warm water until softened.
3. While the meat is marinating and the vermicelli is soaking, mince the garlic, ginger, and green onion (also guesstimated amounts).
4. Saute the garlic and ginger in some oil on high, then add the meat mixture and green onion. As it cooks, break the meat up into very small pieces with your spatula. When the meat is mostly cooked, add the vermicelli and turn heat down to medium-low.
5. Stirring, add small amounts of soaking water continuously to the pan to keep the vermicelli from sticking, until done (about two minutes). Seasoning with soy sauce and chili garlic sauce to taste by mixing with the water (this keeps the sauces from staying in only one portion of the noodles).
6. When done, the vermicelli (tree) should be bouncy, and the small bits of pork (ants) should cling to the noodles.